October 11, 2020 – Don’t invite me to your party.

Gonna throw a party? Don’t invite me. If it’s a costume party, it’s a pretty sure bet that I won’t wear one and I also won’t drink, won’t smoke, won’t mingle and I sure as heck won’t dance. I may make a trip or two to the ‘snack bar’ and enjoy your food, but then

October 10, 2020 – Let’s do lunch sometime.

Are you one of those people that likes to say, “Let’s do lunch sometime” when you don’t know how else to exit a conversation? Well, unless you really mean it, I implore you, please don’t. There are a lot of people in the world (including me) that will take you at your word. And when

October 9, 2020 – Lack of Supervision

We weren’t your average family, not even close. I suppose we sort of resembled one (to outsiders) when my biological father was in the picture, but once my mom left my dad (with good reason I might add), things got rather wild. There was very little structure when it was just my mom in charge.

October 8, 2020 – Stage Fright

So many missed opportunities, so many. I yearned to perform, I knew I could really get the crowd on its feet. If only I could conquer ‘the beast’. While I was in grade school, a piano recital was the first time it reared its ugly head. I had practiced for weeks, months. I could play

October 7, 2020 – Don’t you love it when people say, “It could always be worse”?

I just stubbed my toe and I am trying not to scream or cry. My toe is throbbing so I rock back and forth on the floor to distract myself until the pain subsides and I can regain my composure. You heard me faintly in the distance, when I first called out. And out of

October 6, 2020 – Who cut the cheese?

Some of you might think I’m referring to actual cheese. You know, types like gorgonzola, brie, cheddar, provolone, pepper jack and the like. The rest of you know exactly what I’m talking about. You likely do what I tend to do when a particular song by the Cranberries comes on the radio, crack a smile

October 5, 2020 – You’ve gotta love dogs.

I started out as a cat person. I absolutely l-o-v-e-d cats. Have you heard of the saying, “I love you to death”? Well, I do admit that at some point in my childhood, I may have ‘realized’ that saying in the worst possible way. I must first clarify that it was purely unintentional. If it

October 4, 2020 – Bad eggs, every family has at least one.

Most families have a bad egg or two. And when I say ‘bad egg’, I’m not referring to the kind you might fry up and pair with a slice of bacon and possibly an english muffin. I’m talking about bad people. I know that sounds rather harsh but in this case, it’s true. These are

October 3, 2020 – Ms. Ophonia, why did you choose me?

I would like to sincerely apologize to all of my former employers and co-workers for driving you nuts during the time we spent together. I am sure most of you breathed a sigh of relief when you learned I was leaving and didn’t have to deal with me any longer. I only recently discovered that

October 2, 2020 – Craigslist or Bust

Need a job, or looking for rental property, or maybe you want to purchase or sell a car? One word, Craigslist. It’s also a great site to check out if you need a laugh. I have come across so many unusual things that have completely baffled my mind, I cannot even begin to tell you!